There’s a fungus among us!

After selling my catering business in New York and before I moved to Boston, I worked for a steel erection company which had a New York office but was based out of Pittsburgh. There were only a few of us who worked in the actual office; most of the employees worked on separate job sites all over the city. I quickly became really good friends with some of them; most who were young engineers, far away from their homes and families. They used to share the rent on multiple bedroom apartments and, as they didn’t know many people outside of work, would spend most evenings & weekends together. Every once in a while they would come to my upstate home in Newburgh for a home cooked meal or I would go into the city & stay with them for the weekend… we ALWAYS had a great time together! This one time in particular…


I had gone down to the Bronx after work on a Friday to stay with my friend, Tim and go out with the crew to their favorite Irish pub for drinks. I remember it being about a mile from Tim’s apartment; it was in the spring but a slight chill still lingered in the air and the walk was refreshing. I remember sitting on a barstool drinking Vodka Gimlets for hours. The air was a lot more “refreshing” when we left the pub that night and it was the only thing that kept me from tossing my cookies! Needless to say, the next day we were all pretty hung over. Tim & I went to the mall and chowed down on cinnamon buns and coffee before going clothes shopping for the remainder of the morning. By the time we were heading back over the Tappan Zee Bridge, I had decided to stay for one more night and had offered to cook dinner for the whole gang. I have so many fond memories of that day… fresh bread from the bakery and cappuccino & pastry on Arthur Avenue, the outdoor vegetable stand where we got tons of huge mushrooms and also going to the Italian butcher to get the most gorgeous chicken breast that I had ever seen. Yes… food can be gorgeous! It would have been a perfect afternoon had I not seen all of the dead animals hanging in the window; talk about tossing cookies!!!

There ended up to be about 20 of us around the dinner table and the menu was:

Mandarin Orange Salad with Sweet Citrus Dressing
Fresh Bread with Garlic Butter
Triple Mushroom Chicken Marsala
Horseradish Garlic Mashed Potatoes
Oven Roasted String Beans

Everyone had a blast however… before, during then after dinner drinks… we were loaded… again! Tim was supposed to go into work at 11pm that night on one of the NYC bridges but he was passed out on the floor. I didn’t want him to get in trouble so I decided to “call him in sick”. I knew his supervisor, Pat so I disguised my voice when I said, “Hello, this is Tim’s mother. I’m afraid that he’s not feeling well and will not be able to make it in tonight.” Pat asked what was wrong with him and I said that I didn’t know. He proceeded to hound me for every gorey symptom or ill sign that Tim had. He badgered me for so long that I became frustrated... Did he know it was me? Pat asked, “Well… what did he have for dinner? Maybe he has food poisoning!” At that point I exploded at the thought of my cooking being insulted and said the only thing that came to mind, “He had Chicken Marsala with lots of mushrooms, you moron… he’s got a yeast infection!!!” Pat hung up on me; Tim got in trouble on Monday morning.

Lesson learned… don’t do anyone any favors when your own brain is soaked in Chardonnay!