How to “Brown-Nose the Boss”; NOT like the Dead Milkmen!

In my never ending quest to gain useless knowledge, I ran across some interesting song lyrics. Way back when (so long ago I had never heard of them before now), a band called the Dead Milkmen recorded a song titled, “Do the Brown-Nose”. The oh-so-catchy little chorus aroused my attention and I thought I’d share it with you; it goes something like this:

Bend yo’ knees (ooh LaLaLa...)
Move yo’ head like this… ♪
♪ Pucker dem lips up (ooh LaLaLa...)
Give dat butt a kiss!

This little ditty, though slightly abrasive, got me thinking about the long time moral debate… is it okay to brown-nose or butter-up your boss? Can a little extra stroking help you climb the corporate ladder or is it an ethical indiscretion all together?

While many folks think that it’s totally wrong to try and advance their careers in this way, others are washing cars, babysitting during vacations & walking dogs on their lunch hours or picking up their manager’s dry cleaning on their way into the office in the morning. Does gathering up the steamy & squishy load of poop of the CED (chief executive dog) sound enticing to you?!!! I didn’t think so. Well fear no more my stinky-fingered friends; it’s time to pull some pork!

My boss is a wonderful man; he’s kind, funny, compassionate and very generous; although… you can never be TOO generous! Every year around bonus time, (and Christmas, and his birthday, and when he’s stressed out, and for potluck lunch, etc.), I just whip him up a batch of my “Jack Daniels BBQ Pulled Pork”. I present it to the, I’m-dieting-no-really, old guy (but younger than me) with some nice crusty bread and a smile and before you know it… “Cha ching”!!!... I’m seeing dollar signs! I’ve even overheard him bragging about how good it is to his colleagues!

So many people don’t make pulled pork because they think that it’s difficult… not mine… the crock pot does all of the work and I reap all of the rewards. Check it out:

“Jack Daniels BBQ Pulled Pork”


1 6-7 lb. Pork Butt
Water
2 Large Sliced Yellow or Vidalia Onions
6 Cloves Chopped Garlic
Salt & Pepper to Taste
2 Bottles of your favorite BBQ Sauce
Garlic Powder to Taste
½ Cup Hot Sauce
1 Cup Brown Sugar
1 Cup Jack Daniels

Place sliced onions and garlic on the bottom of a crock pot. Set pork butt on top and pour enough water over pork to amount to 1 inch on bottom of crock pot. Season with salt and pepper. Set crock pot to “low” and cook approximately 10 hours (don’t worry, you cannot over cook this). Using 2 large spoons, gently lift pork out of pot (it will be falling apart). Discard onions, garlic & all liquid from the pot then place pork back in. Gently stir in BBQ sauce, garlic powder, hot sauce, brown sugar and Jack Daniels while pulling the meat apart. Cover and finish cooking on “low” for additional 20 minutes. Serve immediately or let cool, refrigerate and reheat for later.


Serve with crusty bread & coleslaw or on a Bulkie roll with roasted potatoes & green salad, by itself or with a slice of cheddar cheese and grilled onions on top; Mr. Daniels would be proud!

So if you’d like to soar through that corporate hierarchy, please take my advice… bring in a batch of this down-home, succulent feast; complete with the bread and the smile, and you will soon be indispensable to all of those above you. And... as you sit there day after day processing words on that keyboard, talking to International clients on your Blackberry and gathering ‘round the water cooler with your coworkers, always remind yourself that Jack Daniels BBQ under your fingernails smells much better than dog poop!

Woof!!!